Research: audience feed back on first draft

Below is some feedback from my target audience on my first draft of my music video. The first comment is from the video that I posted on Vimeo. Most of the people liked my video but said that I should try and create slightly more of a narrative by putting shots of the girl in earlier in the video. The comment on Vimeo says that I should lengthen one of my shots. I also contacted my focus group ask about the length of my video as i was concerned it was too long. Charlie answered my message and he said that he thought the video was too long. I agree with all of this feedback and I will aim to incorporate these suggestions in my 2nd draft of my video.